Ten Things Not to Do at The Poker Table

Following are ten things you should try to avoid doing at the poker tables.  As you read, you will see some are just slightly annoying to other players at the table, but, some of the suggestions can actually end up with you getting banned from playing if not followed.

1. Don’t wear the same outfit for the whole of the EPT even if it’s your ‘lucky’ outfit! –  Unless of course you wash it in between times, but who has time to do that between days at a big tournament? Seriously, I have heard players who totally wreak say when questioned about why they are still wearing the same clothes reply “It’s my lucky outfit. I’ll have no chance without it.”

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2. Fall asleep – It has been known for players to actually fall asleep at the felt during live tournaments; but, what I really mean is to make sure you’re alert.  When you are tired, is when players will take advantage of you and you will probably start to leak chips. Guard your chips with your full attention.

3. Eat onion or garlic – This is my pet hate. Come on, talk about stink! Please avoid any stinky snacks.  I don’t care if some people think it will give them an advantage.  It doesn’t affect the way I play them if they have bad breath –  it just makes me think they’re smelly people.  Let’s not stoop to that level when really we can just out-play our opponents anyway!

4. Slow roll – Slow rolling is when you’re at the end of a hand and the other player has turned over their cards and there is just you left in the hand. You know you have the other player beat, but you take ages to turn over your cards making them think they have a chance when they don’t.  A lot of amateur players seem to think this is part of the game because they haven’t got a grasp on the reason good players act like that during the hand.  You have nothing to gain from it – it is only bad etiquette – just don’t do it!

5. Get involved in other peoples hands – When other players at the table are involved in a hand don’t interject and say things such as “I think he has so and so,” or “You should fold,” or even point things out like “Look at her hands shaking.”  In fact, if you’re not in the hand there is no need for you to say anything at all.

Also if you have folded your hole cards, and a flop comes down that would have been good for you don’t let other players know by sighing or by trying to look at your cards again.  For one, it’s not fair on the players still active in the hand as they can narrow down what you had and use that to their advantage.

6. Blame the dealer – Please don’t blame the dealer if they don’t turn over the card you wanted. They have no control over it (unless they’re cheating in which case blame away!)  Players can quite often be seen ranting at the dealer when a hand didn’t go their way and it just makes them look childish.

7. Be scared of overly aggressive players – In poker tournaments there always has been and always will be very aggressive characters. A lot of their aggression and scariness is just meant to make you play badly.  It makes some people play very meekly and others overly aggressive back at them which are both very bad ways to play and will end up costing those players chips and money.  Keep your head, stay cool and remember they’re just doing it to take away your chips.

8. Believe that flirts are only interested in one thing – Yes you’re more gorgeous than Angelina Jolie and Beyonce put together,and you have the most amazing wit and charm and your jokes are so good that you should have your own TV show . . .

BUT that doesn’t mean the guy flirting with you at the poker table is purely just interested in these qualities.  They are, after all, when all is said and done, at the table to take your money period.  So beware the charmer, they may have ulterior motives such as engaging you in conversation so they can get tells from you and then use that information to see when you’re bluffing.

9. Go over the top on the Hollywood – We have all seen it on TV, top class poker pros ‘acting’ as if they have a really hard decision to make and then folding or staring at their opponents to try and break them.  It’s television after all; and lots of the boring bits have been edited out.  In a real game, the same players sit there for hours and hours doing nothing like that at all.  So don’t sit there and stare at other players in the hand for five minutes every time you have the slightest decision to make. All it does is just wastes everybody’s time and the blinds will be really high far too quickly, if you continually do this.

10. Chew Gum – Chewing gum for fun or to take away the effects of a stinky lunch?  Don’t.  Watching how a player chews their gum and then stops chewing during certain hands or situations is a great way for all the other players to work out what cards you’re holding.

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One thing you SHOULD do at the poker table – like I said in my last Woman Poker Player article, is relax– yes, Emma says relax, smile, have fun, stay cool with your best head on your shoulders and you should be able to enjoy winning all those delicious poker chips that come your way.

Last year was dubbed ‘the year of the women’ in poker – let’s show them that we were just warming up.

See Emma’s new site at http://www.pokerharder.com/uk

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